The scales

From Daily Humor at Refdesk:

"At the scale-manufacturers' convention, people often wanted to weigh themselves on different scales to see if they agreed. Some visitors abstained, however, not wishing to advertise their weight.

A smooth-talking representative coaxed a woman onto his scale by promising her that he would not look and that she could even cover the digital display so only she could see her weight.

She finally stood on the scale, whereupon a loud, mechanical voice from within the machine announced: "One hundred and sixty-three."

There's my nightmare in a joke; publicly announcing my weight. Eww-owwwwww!